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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23651371">Just The Two Of Us</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/voltarrrrr/pseuds/voltarrrrr'>voltarrrrr</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Good Lucius Malfoy, Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, Light Angst, M/M, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Minor Violence, Questioning Sexuality, Sad Gilderoy Lockhart, Slurs, bitter sweet ending, everyone is bad at feelings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 22:22:11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,626</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23651371</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/voltarrrrr/pseuds/voltarrrrr</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Gilderoy Lockhart. The probably most popular student at Hogwarts. And he was gay. Even a blind person could see that. Well... that's what Lucius Malfoy thought.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Gilderoy Lockhart/Lucius Malfoy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Just The Two Of Us</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Gilderoy Lockhart. The probably most popular student at Hogwarts. And he was gay. Even a blind person could see that. Well... that's what Lucius Malfoy thought.<br/>
The young Slytherin was almost certain that Gilderoy was... not straight. He thought it was quite obvious actually. To him at least.</p><p>His confusion was therefore understandable once Gilderoy started hitting up one girl after the other.<br/>
It just didn't make sense to him.</p><p>But why did it even bother him? He asked himself this question almost daily when he caught himself staring and wondering.<br/>
Actually it wasn't even supposed to bother him who Lockhart got it on with, right?!<br/>
Lucius came to the conclusion that, surely, it simply must be wanting to get a deeper understanding of the other. Definetly. Nothing else.</p><p>If he was completely honest though, he had to admit that boys were by far more interesting to him than girls. This, he would never ever reveal to anyone, of course.<br/>
Despite the fact that everyone would have a problem with that, including himself, he specifically was worried about his family.<br/>
He was sure this interest, his curiousity, would be over soon. Merely a phase.<br/>
He was certain even.</p><p>-...-</p><p>Gilderoy maybe wasn't the smartest of all students but he surely was a massive romantic.<br/>
However, in the past few weeks this side of him didn't really managed to show through.<br/>
Being merely 17 years old, he had managed to get into bed with a good amount of girls of his school. Simply because he was frustrated. Frustrated because he was attarcted to boys.</p><p>He tried and tried telling himself that this wasn't possible. It couldn't be. Not him.<br/>
Gilderoy Lockhart. Every teenage girl's wet dream.</p><p>Being unable to admit this attraction to himself, he tried ignoring everything by spending more time with girls who were more than happy about being center of his faked interest.</p><p>He wasn't homophobic or anything... not at all. One of his friends, a girl from Hufflepuff, was a lesbian. But he just didn't want to be gay.</p><p>The usually well spirited and always incredibly charming Lockhart began to become more and more unhappy with everything.</p><p>Unhappy with the situation.<br/>
Unhappy with himself.</p><p>What did it even matter to be handsome if no one seemed to genuinely care for him?<br/>
Of course, many girls were after him. But that was because of his looks.</p><p>Put a fake smile on and everything would be fine.<br/>
No one would question it and if they did, he would grin brightly and convince them everything was alright.<br/>
That worked well.<br/>
up until the day it didn't anymore.</p><p>A totally stressed Gilderoy was pacing the halls, glaring at anyone he came across, no matter if it was a student, teacher or even a ghost and portrait.<br/>
He didn't care what they would think of him. It didn't matter. Not anymore.</p><p>Of course, the young Malfoy noticed this aswell. He had no choice but do so, considering the Ravenclaw even dared to send deathly glares his way at potions class.<br/>
Lucius decided, for once, to keep his mouth shut and not to comment on it. At the same time he swore he would curse the other if he dared to do that again.<br/>
He was a Malfoy after all. The audacity...</p><p>Later that day, Lucius walked down a hallway, heading towards a certain classroom.<br/>
Classes were already over but Slughorn had offered him to use one of the rooms to learn in privacy. A benefit he surely had gained by being nothing but absolutely charming towards his house teacher.</p><p>"What the-"<br/>
Books dropping to the ground once he had opened the door, the blonde Slytherin was staring at what was happening in front of him with big eyes.</p><p>"It's not what it looks like!" a familiar voice blurted out in panic.</p><p>"It's exactly what it looks like." another voice added, almost sounding offended.</p><p>Malfoy couldn't help but keep on staring, unable to realize what he just had witnessed.</p><p>Apparently it now was a thing that when you tried to study in peace, you would stumble upon Lockhart getting his neck covered in hickeys by a male Gryffindor while his knee was pressed into the moaning Ravenclaw's groin.</p><p>Lucius was... speechless. To say the least. At the same time he couldn't remove his gaze.</p><p>"Lucius, please don't tell anyone. Please!" Lockhart whined in a panicked manner and wriggled himself out of the other student's grasp in order to stumble over to the Slytherin with a pleading glance.</p><p>An annoyed sigh escaped the Gryffindor: "Get over it!" he growled and left the room, glaring at Lucius in the process.</p><p>The door closed and left behind were a confused Slytheirn, aswell as an almost scared Ravenclaw.</p><p>It stayed quiet and silence reigned over them.<br/>
Nervously, Gilderoy chewed his bottom lip while gazing at Malfoy.</p><p>"Are you...?" Lucius suddenly asked, tone eventually a bit too harsh for the other to handle.</p><p>Tears shot into Lockhart's eyes which he quickly managed to blink away.</p><p>"N-no! No."<br/>
He cleared his throat.<br/>
"Me?"<br/>
He forced himself to smile.<br/>
"Never. Not me."</p><p>Quickly he grabbed his bag and, as nervous as he was, stumbled twice as he left the room aswell.</p><p>Well, that certainly came unexpected!</p><p>-...-</p><p>Ever since that one occurence, Lockhart intentionally tried to never cross paths with the Slytherin. Didn't even dare to look at him-<br/>
All in all, he began to get more quiet.<br/>
One could barely see him flirt anymore. Most of the time he was alone and only rarely talked to anyone.</p><p>Of course, everyone noticed and rumours started spreading.<br/>
For whatever reason, most seemed to agree that Gilderoy must be in a serious relationship.<br/>
Girls discussed and tried guessing who the lucky one was but no one seemed to get an answer out of him.
How could they?
There was no girlfriend after all.
But he didn't deny those theories either, being way too scared of Malfoy revealing anything about their past encounter.
He was better off with people thinking he was taken.</p><p>And Lucius himself?<br/>
It might come off as a surprise but even he wasn't the same after what happened.</p><p>After having recovered from the first schock, he felt confirmed in his previous theory. Lockhart was indeed gay! It was nice knowing he had been right about that all along.<br/>
However, he quickly realised that he couldn't get the Ravenclaw out of his head anymore.</p><p>He couldn't get rid of that picture in front of his eyes.</p><p>It even went so far that one day, in a dream, it was him who had pressed his knee between the other's legs.<br/>
Yes, it had been him who was allowed to touch and feel the other's warm skin beneath his hands.<br/>
It was him exploring his sensitive neck with his soft lips.<br/>
And he hated himself for it.<br/>
It was wrong.<br/>
Disgusting even.</p><p>Even if it didn't feel like it.<br/>
He couldn't only assume Gilderoy having a simillar crisis with himself.</p><p>-...-</p><p>A couple of weeks later everything pretty much got back to normal.<br/>
Lockhart still was quieter than usual but gossip got less interesting which made him feel less stressed.<br/>
Lucius learned to fully ignore his feelings and didn't dream about Lockhart again so that was a win.<br/>
He had almost hoped to fully forget about what happened.<br/>
But of course life had other plans. What else.</p><p>It came that the young Malfoy entered the boy's bathroom on the third floor one day, suspecting nothing bad, as suddenly an aggresive sounding voice echoed through the halls.</p><p>"I won't let a faggot like you tell me what to do."</p><p>"Oh, come on! Shut up! I already apologized, dumbass."</p><p>Wasn't that Lockhart's voice?</p><p>Lucius didn't have more time to think about much longer since he suddenly heard a pained groan.<br/>
He decided to take action, one of his dusties being a prefect.</p><p>"Hey, what's going on here?!"</p><p>There was Gilderoy holding his face, a bloody nose, blood covering his hand aswell.<br/>
For some reason he backed off a bit further once seeing Lucius but there was no time to question this strange behaviour.<br/>
First off he had to deal with his fellow student, coming from the house Slytherin aswell.</p><p>"What was that about?" Malfoy asked in a stern tone, glaring at the sixth grader.</p><p>"That faggot tried getting close. I simply payed him back." he replied, almost seeming proud of what he had done, arms crossed in front of his chest, chin slightly held up.</p><p>With a raised brow Lucius stared at the boy, then to Lockhart. Then back to the other Slytherin: "Fuck off; Keaton."</p><p>"You're not seriously siding with him, Malfoy?!"</p><p>"I told you to fuck off. Or I'll tell Slughorn."</p><p>The Slytherin finally left, shaking his head and directing an angry "Fuck you" at Lucius.</p><p>A deep sigh left Malfoy once they were finally alone and he turned around to Gilderoy.<br/>
Their eyes met.<br/>
Silence.</p><p>"Let me see your face!" Lucius then demanded and got closer to the Ravenclaw who in return backed away once more. Lucius stopped. "Relax, I merely wanna check if your nose is broken or not."<br/>
His tone seemed a bit helpless, way too rough. But Gilderoy sensed that the intention behind them was genuine.<br/>
Carefully he lowered his hand, revealing his bloody nose and let the other have a look.</p><p>"Hm, it doesn't look broken to me but maybe you should consider paying the hospital wing a visit anyways." Malfoy spoke and shrugged before heading over to one of the sinks.<br/>
He brought up a white tissue, getting it wet and then starting to carefully clean off the blood from Lockhart's face.</p><p>The Ravenclaw himseld had said absolutely nothing so far, merely staring at the other in front of him.<br/>
It took a while until Lucius was done with his work and once more, he was the one breaking the silence.</p><p>"Everything alright?"</p><p>A quiet grumble was the only reply he received.</p><p>"I suppose this is a no."</p><p>Malfoy backed off a little again, curiously glancing at his fellow student. But he still said nothing.</p><p>"I also suppose I won't get a simple thank you?!"<br/>
He was a bit surprised about how getnle his tone had suddenly gotten, the usual sharpness nowhere to be found.</p><p>Soon he was ripped from his thoughts as suddenly Gilderoy tried to leave.<br/>
Quickly, he grabbed the wizard's wrist who immediately tensed up, panic rising in his expression as he glanced back at the Slytherin.</p><p>"Wait, I still need to know what exactly happened."</p><p>"Why?" Lockhart hissed back.</p><p>"It's my duty. Prefect and so on."</p><p>"Let me go!"</p><p>"Only if you tell me what happened. I doubt Keaton just randomly punched you in the face."</p><p>Suddenly, Gilderoy got incredibly angry.</p><p>"He did! That's exactly what he did." he cried out. "He had no reason to. It was a misunderstanding. And I apologized immediately. So yes, I would say it was absolutely random. Why am I even telling you all this?! It's not like you're any better. Nobody is. Main thing is you all find someone to mutually shit on for something no one can control. Just tell me how disgusting it is! I know. I also know that you wouldn't understand. No one does."</p><p>Tears started streaming down his face, his breathing quick and uneven.</p><p>As if glued to the ground, Lucius stood there, unable ton move, unable to speak. He was totally overwhelmed. Unsure what was expected of him. </p><p>Lockhart used the opportunity to free himself out of the grip and run away with a devestated sob. </p><p>-...-</p><p>Oh, how much Lucius wished he had been able to tell the truth back then.<br/>
That he actually was able to understand.<br/>
That he felt the same.</p><p>But he didn't.<br/>
And he never would tell.<br/>
He was certain.</p><p>It was close to midnight, New Year's Eve, when the long haired Slytherin spotted a certain Ravenclaw in the quiet library.<br/>
A single candle lit up the dark corner to which he had retorted to.</p><p>"Didn't think I would meet you here, Lockhart." Lucius spoke calmly, making Gilderoy tense up for a moment.</p><p>"Why aren't you celebrating with all the others in the great hall?" asked the Slytherin, slightly tilting his head as he curiously watched the other.</p><p>"I could ask you the same." he mumbled his reply.</p><p>"Oh, I'm not missed there. Most of my friends are at home with their families." he explained. "You, however, have loads of admirers here, longing for your attention."</p><p>A contemptuous tone left Lockhart and he lightly shook his head.<br/>
Lucius decided to ignore this and continued speaking.</p><p>"Why aren't you home anyways?"</p><p>"I need time to think."</p><p>"Then we seemt to be here for the same reason."</p><p>"I doubt that; Malfoy."</p><p>"Doubt as much as you want."</p><p>Silence fell over them. As always.</p><p>Shortly after the Slytherin slowly sat down next to the other who was staring at the ground.</p><p>"Back then in the bathroom... Well I just wanted to say that I..." the Ravenclaw started but seemed to struggle to find the right words. "I wanted to say that I understand you. I-I realised that you and everyone else is right about... about it being wrong. I understand now. And I accept it. But that doesn't change anything about me and my.... wrongness."</p><p>Thinking about what he was told, he slowly nodded: "I understand this."</p><p>"Thank you."</p><p>More silence.</p><p>Lucius suddenly felt his heart beating faster. There was this sudden urge to share his own thoughts. His own feelings and longings.<br/>
He wanted to say why he undertsood. Wanted Lockhart to know the reason.<br/>
That he felt the same.</p><p>"It's... frustrating." he then blurted out without thinking twice when he couldn't take the silence no longer.</p><p>"What do you mean?"</p><p>He didn't dare looking at Lockhart and one could hear how concentrated he seemed to be about what he was about to say.</p><p>"To know never being able experiencing this... freedom. That love seems to be some sort of weird concept regulated and controlled after all.</p><p>Gilderoy frowned, confused about the words the other spoke.</p><p>"Well yes but Lucius you-"</p><p>All of a sudden, Lockhart realised and everything made sense to him. With big eyes he stared at the other sitting next to him.</p><p>"Wait, you too-?"</p><p>The Slytherin took a deep breath and finally dared to look at the Ravenclaw.<br/>
Never had he felt so vulnerable. So exposed.<br/>
Never had he revealed something so private.<br/>
And he probably never would again.</p><p>A short, sad nod was his reply.</p><p>"But as you said: It doesn't change anything about it being wrong."</p><p>"That's true but..."</p><p>"What is it?"</p><p>"But we could..."</p><p>Gilderoy didn't dare finishing his sentence. And just as Lucius wanted to bring the other to spill his thoughts, loud hissing and banging could be heard coming from outside.<br/>
Both looked out of the window and saw the colourful fireworks which signalled them that a new year had begun.</p><p>Lost in thought, the Slytherin stared out of the window while the Ravenclaw finally had enough courage to end his thought.</p><p>"Let us be free for one night. Together."</p><p>Luciu's head turned in the other's direction and in the next moment he felt soft lips touching his own.<br/>
A warm feeling spread itself inside his whole body and there immediately was a longing for more.</p><p>They stared at each other after parting again.</p><p>It took them a moment to recover but after all one could hear Malfoy's voice:</p><p>"For one night."</p><p>"One night."</p><p>"And then never again"</p><p>"Never again." Gilderoy gulped at the thought. But it had to be done.</p><p>A short nod from the Slytherin was the agreement.</p><p>The agreement to one night in freedom.</p>
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